I am totally obsessed with Game of Thrones and totally morose that I have completely caught up with it – while it is amazing that the internet cannot spoil anything for me about GoT right now, it is so depressing that there won’t be anything new for quite a while.
The idea for this post came to me while watching the last episode of Season 4. I was immediately entertained by myself and thought this would make such a fun post!
The Lannisters are unquestionably the worst family in Game of Thrones. They are corrupted with greed, incest and the need for power. They all, save maybe one, have a fatal flaw.
The Layers of Lannisters can be best described as a burnt cake.
Layers of burnt cake:
The bottom of the cake, completely burnt and disgusting, stuck to the baking tray.
The hard shell
The rotten core
The cherry on the cake
The candidates and their placings
- Joffrey Baratheon/Lannister is without a doubt the worst creation to have sprung from the Lannisters. It might be something to do with the fact that he is the incestuous creation of Jamie and Cersei, but I actually disagree with this notion. Tommen and Marcella are also born of that charming relationship, but they seem to be kind and sweet, completely unlike their horrific older brother. As the bottom of the cake, he just brings the whole business down. You have to scrub extra hard to remove that last layer from the baking tray you used, and sometimes you have to use some toxic materials to get the job done (hint hint wink wink)
- Tywin Lannister as the Hard Shell. You have to crack that shell pretty damn hard to get to the problem underneath. I actually admire Tywin Lannister and although I don’t agree with his methods, he is never conniving and underhanded and working on ulterior motives. He is what he is and if you don’t like it, sorry for you. Protecting his family name and ensuring his legacy continues is what this guy lives for, and you can’t fault that. I do question his very dodgy parenting techniques though.
- Cercei and Jamie Lannister. All the drama connected to the Lannisters can be pointed back at them. Or mostly. Joffrey, the biggest fuckhead ever, is the world’s best example as to why brothers and sisters aren’t meant to procreate. Both these characters have a few redeeming qualities. Okay, Cercei has one – she loves her children to madness. I do think she is ACTUALLY mad. I mean, banging your brother is just not something I can sympathise with. Now, I have to say that Jamie Lannister has a lot of good qualities. He has his bad side – sister banging and all, but he has the oddest moments of courage and kindness. Saving Brienne finally endeared him to me, but I am still peeved that he attacked Ned because lover/sister said so. But Jamie has layers, good and bad, and I really love him and every contradiction he offers.
- Tommen and Marcella Lannister. The pretty icing on the cake belongs to these two. They are redeemable and seem genuinely sweet, and can save the appearance of the dodgy tribe of Lannister. Marcella was removed from the scene before she could be properly portrayed, but the two younger inbreeds look like they at least have some decent qualities. It is clearly obvious that Tommen has none of the qualities his brother has and is perhaps the only chance the new generation of Lannisters have of ever being something respectable.
- Tyrion Lannister is definitely the cherry on the cake. He is the best of the Lannisters. He is one of my favourite characters ever. He is book smart and has a kindness in him very few of his family members share. I get so outraged with all the injustice that gets thrown to his side. He has a sarcastic, insightful nature, and his plans are always thought out. I have said if he dies I will NOT watch this show anymore.