Movie Review: Cruel Intentions (1999)

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Plot: Two vicious step-siblings of an elite Manhattan prep school make a wager: to deflower the new headmaster’s daughter before the start of term.

Rating: 7/10

Watching Cruel Intentions confirmed my belief that I was really the most well behaved teenager alive. I lived in books and in my head and had a small group of friends. I didn’t have the desire to rebel. So when I watch these movies I get such a shock and I’m like ARE YOU ALL REALLY LIKE THAT? My mom would have opened a can of whoop-ass if I tried this shit.

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Cruel Intentions is essentially about two rich, privileged children who play with the feelings and lives of other rich white kids and one black kid. Sarah Michelle Geller is hands down the worst white kid, sniffing cocaine out of her rosary and only revealing her intentions to her slightly less horrible step brother, with who she has a very disturbing Cersei/Jaime vibe, at least without any real blood ties. Selma Blair is a really dumb girl in Cruel intentions and who is really ready to be promiscuous. It was really uncomfortable watching such a dumb girl be so dumb and big applause to Blair who has never even given me a whiff of stupidity in any other situation. Ryan Phillipe is really well cast in any situation where he is set to play a really privileged person. He does it with a natural ability which makes me wonder if that isn’t his real natural ability shining through. His character is not without redeeming qualities and when he becomes ensnared in Reese Witherspoon’s innocent charm, it is strong enough to drastically change his ways.  Sarah Michelle Geller obviously had a really good time with being the villain, and I really liked her in this despicable role. She also looks really nice with brown hair, who would have thought?

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Cruel Intentions felt a bit like what Gossip Girl would have been if the characters had been even more spoiled. The end was really shocking and very sad, but would it have had such an impact with a happy ending? I actually really liked this film, though I wouldn’t recommend you watch it with any parental figure in the area – it would be a complete embarrassment to both of you.

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